“You have no idea how many interesting people you’ll meet after high school’s over. Your life partner, your best friend, the most wonderful person you’ll ever know is sitting in some high school right now waiting to graduate and walk into your life–maybe even feeling all the same things are you, maybe even wondering about you, hoping you’re strong enough to make it to the future where you’ll meet.” from Forgive Me, Leonard Peacock by Matthew Quick
I wasn’t sure when I started this audiobook that I should be listening to it at the time. Between stress at work, stress over home selling, stress over temporary living situations, stress over trying to buy a house that I think is the best combination of mine and my husband’s personalities we will ever find, stress over needing to introvert but can’t, stress over how to avoid having a panic attack, etc. You get the idea. I’m stressed. Thus, listening to a book about teenage suicidal thoughts might not have been in my best interests, or was it?
In my defense, I forgot was the book was about and just picked an audiobook to listen to and get off my computer. So, lesson one, since this is a reoccurring theme, maybe I should look up the summary of the audiobook to know what I’m getting into first. Nah, what’s the fun in that?
Leonard Peacock, or LP as you hear throughout the book, is an outcast, much like any teenager feels, except there’s “more”. You know he wants to murder Asher, his former friend, but you don’t realize why until later in the book. As the pieces start falling into place, you are torn between feeling betrayed as Leonard or hurt for Asher and Leonard. You wonder how you can save them both. You are screaming for help for both in your head, reeling from Leonard’s pain. You are applauding those that come to help. You admire those who stand their ground.
And you want to slap the shit out of those who don’t notice when they should. You want to make them SEE, but you can’t. You wonder if they will ever learn.
Suicidal thoughts are not to be taken lightly. The quote above can apply to any situation and clique: high school, job 1, job 2, church, etc. There is always hope, always something better. Yet so many people just give up. Their better day could have been right around the corner, but we didn’t see the signs in time. Will we ever learn?
Forgive me, Leonard Peacock by Matthew Quick left me with plenty to ponder. It is not a feel good book, but it is a good book that leaves you thinking, feeling, deciding. Read it for yourself, for your friends, for your family. Just read it.
If you or anyone you know is dealing with suicidal thoughts, please reach out for help. You are loved and cherished more than you know. It will get better one day. http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/
Forgive Me, Leonard Peacock by Matthew Quick
Narrator: Noah Galvin
Publisher: Hachette Audio
Source: Audiobook Sync
Format: MP3 Audiobook
6 hours 19 minutes 8 seconds
6 parts, 38 chapters