I’d Tell You I Love You…

“Everything in that room is beautiful and refined and reminds us that we don’t just have to be spies — we have to be ladies.”  — I’d Tell You I Love You, But Then I’d Have to Kill You (Gallagher Girls Series, Book 1) by Ally Carter

Story of my life.  Everything around me is beautiful and refined, and I struggle to feel and behave like a lady.  I hate sitting with my legs crossed.  Thunder thighs don’t help much there.  I hate high heeled shoes.  This is better phrased by “I hate shoes.”  I feel funny dressed up and honestly rarely have a good reason to dress up anyways.

I’m expected to be a lady.  I try to be around strangers, but once you break through one of my barriers, you get to see the crude humor, sarcastic wit, often pessimistic view of the world me.  I’m not sure how I’m going to raise my daughters to be ladies when even I find the thought depressing, stiffling, and “un-fun”.  Yet, I’ll train them in the art of “ladyness”, or at least in the art of “faking ladyness”, because that is what women do.  Well, that and spy, gossip, etc.  Oh wait…

I decided to listen to I’d Tell You I Love You, But Then I’d Have to Kill You (Gallagher Girls Series, Book 1) after 3 serious, heart-heavy audio books.  About three-fourths of the way through it, I had the thought of I was listening to a spy version of Cluess meets Mean Girls.  Once the thought was planted, it refused to go away.  Despite that nagging thought, it was a good, light-hearted “read” that was needed after the previous audiobooks.

What girl doesn’t spy?  What girl doesn’t try to break the “bro code”?  Heck, I’m in my 30s and I still do both.  I’m a woman and I’m nosy.  I’ve been told those two facts go hand in hand.  All I missed out of this was going to a secret spy school for girls.  Drats, that would have been fun.

I enjoyed this book.  It’s not one I’d seek out to read now that I’ve listened to it, but it is one I enjoyed and would read if it magically feel in my lap or on my iPhone.  It made the day enjoyable as I issued email after email.  I think “tweens” would enjoy this book, and for that reason alone, I’m glad I listened.  It has boys, mystery, and girls kicking butt.  What tween girl wouldn’t love this!

I’d tell you more, but then I’d have to kill you.  😉


I’d Tell You I Love You, But Then I’d Have to Kill You (Gallagher Girl Series, Book 1) by Ally Carter
Narrator: Renee Raudman
Format: MP3 Audiobook
Publisher: Brilliance Audio
Source: Audiobook Sync
6 parts, 29 chapters
6 hours 51 minutes 6 seconds